Where Dogs are Cheaper than Bureaucrats

There are times in the affairs of men, and apparently dogs, when Providence takes a hand in public business and leaves the taxpayers wondering whether Heaven has finally hired an accountant. Such a time recently arrived in Lyon County, where the animal shelter had reached that stage of overcrowding in which every dog was entitled to a kennel, but mathematics ceased to recognize the claim.

With 36 regular dog kennels and eight quarantine kennels, the crisis saw 69 dogs in residence, with more than 60 additional dogs waiting on the surrender list. This was less an animal shelter than a canine hotel whose management had misplaced the reservation book.

The situation became so serious that Lyon County Animal Services appealed to the public for assistance.

Now, the public is a curious creature. It can ignore a pothole for 20 years, tolerate a broken traffic signal for six months, and pass a suspicious-looking government building without asking a question. But mention a dog in need, and civilization suddenly awakens.

Within one week, 35 dogs left the shelter for new beginnings, freeing three kennels and proving that dogs, unlike certain government committees, can make room simply by leaving.

Still, the crisis had not vanished. Nearly 60 dogs remained on the waiting list, while stray animals continued to arrive with the regularity of taxes and political promises.

It was therefore necessary to find money, which is generally the point at which a noble cause discovers that nobility is not legal tender. Then, nearly a month after the urgent appeal, a mysterious benefactor appeared bearing a $25,000 gift.

The donor wished to remain anonymous, which is probably the proper way to give money in Nevada if one wishes to avoid being appointed chair of something before supper. The donation will pay for spaying and neutering and reduce adoption fees to $50, giving more dogs a chance to exchange the shelter for a sofa, a yard, and a human being who can be trained to open the refrigerator.

It is difficult to calculate the value of such generosity in dollars alone. A dog adopted is a kennel emptied; a kennel emptied is a place for another dog; and another dog saved is another creature spared the dreadful uncertainty of waiting for somebody to notice that it has four legs, two eyes, and a hopeful expression.

Those who cannot adopt are not excused from the enterprise. They may foster, volunteer, or merely tell somebody about a dog that needs a home. The last duty is particularly important, since humanity has invented the telephone, the automobile, and the internet for the express purpose of communicating information and then spending six hours arguing about the weather.

Lyon County Animal Services has thanked the anonymous donor and the community for answering the call. The dogs, being less inclined toward speeches, will presumably express their gratitude by wagging their tails, following their new owners everywhere, and occasionally eating something that was not intended to be eaten.