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Sometime early on in my career as an impressionist of Mark Twain, around 1988, I was invited to speak at the new Lloyd George Federal Building in Las Vegas, and once I passed through security, I saw a spectacular portrait of Judge Lloyd George, whom I supposed was long-gone, but
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Once upon a time I had the best job in America. At 16 years of age, I was the gas jockey of Orinda Union 76. At closing time, it was my job to swab the bay, which was more fun than you might think. I weighed 140 pounds at the
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With thanks to the Banned Book Club at St. Patrick’s, I was invited to speak in Huckleberry’s behalf, so I thought I’d like to pass my thoughts along to you, the gentle reader, while they’re fresh on my mind… Olivia Clemens wanted her husband to become
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So brief is life, I feel compelled to take this moment to save the world. Necessarily I will need to call upon everything I have learned from our generation to address this daunting task, but here goes… How can we avoid a Third World War? We can avoid the scourge
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Away back in 1673, two noted Canadian etymologists, professors Marquette & Jolliet, elected to explore a river that the Native Canadians called, "Mesippi." So they built themselves a short, though very tall two-story boat, the "Nancy," tall enough to accommodate a bunkbed, and off they sailed.
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Henry Hudson…has anybody seen Henry? Has anybody seen the Northwest Passage? These two pieces of profane history have gone missing, and anyone who finds them will win a free trip to Disneyland, or at least Knott's Berry Farm. Let's start our search with Henry. Henry
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As a warmup to celebrating our 250th birthday, I find myself reflecting upon memories regarding the discovery of the Fountain of Youth as I recall them from fourth-grade… The first European to see America, so far as we know, was a Norseman named Barney, sometime around A.D. 986. Barney
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Isn’t it too bad that we are clever enough to create a weapon so powerful as to deter our enemies, then we have to start knocking off our enemies before they replicate that same weapon, and knock us off… Where does it all end? May I humbly suggest Drawing
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It might be safe to say that Moses, the prophet, was the first reporter of record. When Moses received the Ten Commandments, well, this was some heavy news to deliver to an unsuspecting public. I can only imagine the reaction those Commandments might have had in France…“No adultery? Hey,
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Most friends who have visited Twain Haven (my home) over the past nine years have met Huckleberry, my pet Steller Jay who stops by every afternoon at Happy Hour for a Beer Nut. We have a special relationship, a bond we only wish we could pass along to our more
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When Ski Incline expanded to 8500 feet with a new quad to become Diamond Peak back in 1987, Lee Weber Koch invited me to be the first civilian to ride up with her and mountain manager Jim Bradshaw, and ski down. What an honor… School was out that day, and
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Probably because we are so young, we Americans love to show off on our big number birthdays. Personally, I have my costume ironed and hanging in the closet for our 250th Fourth of July. The last big national birthday I celebrated was Jamestown 400, back in 2007, when we celebrated